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xhkxboix Newbie

 Joined: 06 May 2007 More posts by xhkxboix Location: South Pasadena
0.206 Music Forte Dollars
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Posted: Sun May 06, 2007 2:15 am Post subject: Far Away |
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[Though i know, i need to let you go
please don't forget
my love for you will never die.]
What did I do to deserve this
I never even got to say goodbye
I have nothing left to remind me of you
but just to all of the good times,
and all of the stupid fights
I feel so lonely without you and just to live off your memories
I need to know that you'll still be here for me
It's so hard to look up into the sky,
Knowing well now where you reside, where you rest in peace.
*
the journey through these memories
has been a painful one but now i see
these lingering thoughts will find the best of me
Life is so hard without you by my side
I'd give anything to see you alive just one more time
to this day i wonder why
I wonder why you were taken from me
and it seem no matter how hard i try
i can't hold back the tears that cry
for you.. for years and years... oh why...
there's nothing i wouldn't do
to have you back but i need to move... on...
*
The Jounrey through these memories has been hell but now i see
these lingering thoughts will get the best of me..
~~**
You left me as a boy here on this land
you've taught me what i need to know
and now i'm beginning to understand
what you've left here for me, you taught me how to be a man
i realize, that in all of life. there's nothing better than to live the day
like the moment i met you, i wanna be with you but until the day,
i'll give you peace, i'll see you again, for now, you not too far away.
-----------------------
I've been working on this song for a while now.. lol
well in terms of chord progression and all that..
i wrote most of the lyrics and stuff just last night and some earlier this morning.. and some more while i was at a friend's house just messing with his guitar... I don't know if i'm done with the lyrics.. but it's what i got right now..
yeah.. lol.. tell me how you think it sounds.. and be honest. lol
i wanna hear what you think.. |
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Reconsiderate Forum Moderator

 Joined: 19 May 2005 More posts by Reconsiderate
96.109 Music Forte Dollars

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Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 4:00 pm Post subject: Re: Far Away |
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| xhkxboix wrote: |
| tell me how you think it sounds.. and be honest. |
well, the sentiments are yours and are, in my opinion, not up for judgment. so right on in that department.
as far as the lyrics go, i personally like to see things a little bit more free form. that is to say, not every line following the same number of syllables and same alternating pattern of emphasis/not emphasis. then again, this type of writing does tend to work very well when set to music. makes it easy to follow and hum along with, which is important for any lyricist who's interested in attracting casual passersby.
so i guess we'd really need to hear the song to tell. if you get it recorded, post it on your music forte page and let us know.
Last edited by Reconsiderate on Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:53 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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rockrgrl88 Newbie

 Joined: 04 Jun 2007 More posts by rockrgrl88 Location: Los Angeles
0.145 Music Forte Dollars
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Posted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 11:37 am Post subject: |
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| i loved it |
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